Ladies, if you’ve ever gritted your teeth in frustration and felt yourself growing increasingly irritated with your husband, whether it’s a bad habit, annoying behavior or a repeated “mistake,” I have the answer that will change your marriage. And no… I’m not going to call your husband and tell him to get his act together! I don’t have two tickets to Dr. Phil to give away. I’m not even going to teach you how to change him.
Have you ever read a verse from scripture, and suddenly it held new meaning that you’ve never thought of before? Suddenly it applied to something you have never been taught in church or read in a study guide? That happened to me this week. I was annoyed with my husband for some reason I can’t even remember. I was mentally ranting to myself. If you’re married, you know what I was thinking. Ugh, I wish he would… He keeps…. Why can’t he….
(We’ve all had those thoughts. I would bet money on it. If you’re reading this, and you’re married, and you have never thought those kind of thoughts about your husband, you are either in denial or you need to write a book because the rest of us want to know your secret.)
The verse was Philippians 4:8:
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
I believe it was the Holy Spirit that added the phrase about your husband to the end of that verse.
Now regardless of your religious beliefs and faith, this is a sometimes-difficult, yet ingenious way to change your marriage. If you fill your head with good thoughts about your husband, there’s no room to sulk about him, and you have essentially put on those rose color glasses again. Remember those? The ones you haven’t worn since you two were first dating? The ones that allowed you to look past his faults and spend hours writing love letters about everything from his smile to the way he holds his fork?
The next time you find yourself thinking, “Ugh, I wish he would…”. STOP. Pause. Start over. “I love the way he…” Don’t even wait for the opportunity to arise, be proactive by keeping a small daily journal of all the things you love about your husband. List past and present acts of service and love. List anything that is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent or worthy of praise. Your list might start out short, but it will grow as you learn to recognize these things in your spouse and in his actions. Before long, you will find yourself dwelling on these things like a newlywed, gushing all over again.